Sex is an act between two consenting people. Consent means that both people have agreed to everything that is happening. People have sex for many reasons, such as expressing their love for another, wanting to have a child, or satisfying a physical need. In Islam, sex is only permissible when those two people are married and is considered an act of worship. Of course, there are many people – Muslim or not – who choose not to follow those guidelines because the decision to have sex is a complicated one, and requires both parties to think about what factors need to be present to move forward.
While sex can and should bring much pleasure to you, sex is also an act of great responsibility. It is an act that makes you responsible for yourself, but also your partner.
Because it is a responsibility, you must be prepared for sex. Preparing for sex often involves educating yourself on birth control and contraception options, knowing how to use them, engaging in open communication with your partner, and reflecting and exploring your values, ideas and desires before the heat of the moment. If you are not prepared, it may have an effect that you did not plan for. Physical consequences such as pregnancy and sexually transmitted infections can occur. Having an unplanned pregnancy can make achieving your goals harder. For example, a teen may find it harder to graduate high school and college.
Sex may also have social consequences such as tension in your relationship or friendships. Or it may have spiritual consequences such as guilt you may feel if your family doesn’t believe in sex before marriage.
Finally, remember you also have a responsibility to always honor and respect your own boundaries as well as your partner’s. If you are not comfortable with a particular sexual act, or your partner is not comfortable with a particular sexual act, those feelings should be respected and honored, and not honoring them could be considered a crime. No means no.
Despite that vaginal sexual intercourse (the process of the penis inserting inside the vagina) is what makes one lose their virginity, there are many types of sexual acts, such as:
- Oral Sex
- Anal Sex
- Cyber Sex